We Ain't No Marvel's Avengers
by LAIsobel
Summary: He was charming and unpredictable when he wanted to be, man with colorful past and friends like Batman or Daredevil. He'd like to share the past with somebody very important to him now. Little sequel/closure to my Ladybug story. ON HIATUS NOW, SORRY!
1. Author's notes

**AUTHOR'S NOTES – This time they are even important :o)**

So this story comes as a possible sequel to one certain thing mentioned in chapters 15-18 of the Lovely little ladybug story. It just wouldn't leave me alone! Besides for some time it's probably the last you're gonna read from me – there is no time for writing. But hopefully I will manage at least something small from time to time.

At first I wanted to try to write this in a way that would allow me to say that this could also stand as a single story but sorry to say it - there was no way. So yep, this is a sequel and knowing certain parts of the Ladybug story is kinda important...

So here you have some options - read through them and then decide what to do :o) The real story starts with the next chapter named "_SO HE TOLD HER_"

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><p><strong><span>So here are the options for you people so everybody could be happy:<span>**

_1/ If you read the Ladybug story_ - go straight to the next chapter where the story is! :o)

_2/ If you haven't and you want to_ (which would make me very very happy, hehe) - go now, really NOW :o)) And then start with the next chapter once you're done with the ladybug. It's 30 chapters + epilog and you can judge if the story is worth it by the reviews! And if you haven't read anything from me and you're not sure if you want to, you can try something smaller first to decide if you like my writing and then try the Ladybug and then go back here, hehe :o)) Wow - what an option, ha? :o))

_3/ If you haven't read it and you don't want to_, which I can understand, it's a long story and I completely understand when people don't have time for reading those... in that case read this chapter - I will try to explain what has to be explained so you would understand everything in the next chapter = story - yup that means a little summary of the Ladybug story and little explanation of the certain thing that inspired me to write this piece.

Ha :o) Hope this really works out and you all are gonna be happy :o))

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><p><strong><span>! ! ! H U G E S P O I L E R W A R N I N G ! ! !<span>**

So here it is - little explanation - in the Lovely little ladybug story I created a group of people, soldiers. They are Jack's former colleagues. They have their codenames like Batman and Sunny. They were part of one team and they were put through a hell together. They all have their lives and their families. Their families and wives don't know each other, only few information every now and then as it goes in the army but they are not meeting regularly or anything like that. The men however know probably almost everything about each other and their lives. Jack's former CO also knows few bits and pieces of the top secret intel...

And these guys sometimes meet. When somebody they care about is in troubles and in need of help, these men help. They won't do anything against the law but their actions are not exactly following every rule either. They just meet, plan the mission, follow the plan, complete the mission and then they go... they don't thank each other and they don't talk about things either. They just accept them.

In the Ladybug story SG-1 went on a mission, sometimes after the Entity took place, and they got captured in strange caves. Those were made by an alien race to test people's mind and hearts. Only those good ones would survive. The rest would die. Sam and Jack got captured in those caves and they were put through a test. The test itself was something like a pretty intense simulation - months, years of their lives. They believed those were true and real.

In that simulation a lot had happened. For example Cassie got hurt. That was the reason why Jack called his old unit to hunt down the man that had hurt Cassandra. After being saved they all went back to Earth, lost their memories of those years that had never happened, then slowly, very slowly, got those memories back. It was difficult and very painful process for them all.

Sam quit the Air-Force - among all so she could have a relationship with Jack. She stayed in the SGC as a civilian though. Teal'c joined Bra'tac for the time being. We got to know some intel about people like Fraiser or Ferretti as well. And Daniel had troubles with his eyes, he ended up nearly blinded.

The story ends with hope that things would be better in the future and that the team would get back together again, someday.

Now you should be able to understand this story with no problems. But still I would say that reading Ladybug is better than this small attempt of summarization, hehe :o))


	2. So he told her

**WE**** AIN****'****T**** NO**** MARVEL****'****S ****AVENGERS ****written**** by ****Isobel**

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><p><em>So I wasn't entirely sure about the plot so … lemme know what you think about it. A bit of happiness, cuteness, some sad moments… all together it should be something you could enjoy. I hope…<em>

_**Timeline:** Ladybug story happened after the Entity… now we are few months later. Both stories have pleasant weather – so it can be both spring and autumn – take your pick :o)_

_**Spoilers:**up to Entity and then through the Ladybug story_

_**Beta**: none so far but I'm sure she'll do her magic later :o)_

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><p><strong>So he told her<strong>

Samantha Carter knew that some things would always make her happy. She had always known about some of those. But surprisingly during the last few weeks, actually, maybe months, she had discovered some more. And she understood – there would never be enough of these small things and moments in her life. She would always crave more.

Waking up next to Jack was the best way to start her day. Having breakfast with him, seeing him all sleepy and cute was another of those things. His jokes while watching the Simpsons would always make her at least giggle, sometimes laugh along with him. Seeing him with Cassie was one of her favorites. She would usually just stand there and watch them. But it had always been like that.

Right now she was lying in her bed, well, their bed, watching Jack sleep. Lying on his stomach, barely covered with a blanket, one of his hands placed on her body while the other one was holding the pillow under his head. He looked so peaceful and adorable. And she loved this particular view, the whole scene, all the implications. It was so simple, so innocent and she loved every second of it.

She found out soon after they had started this whole serious relationship thing that he really liked to hold her through the night. He would never need much. He just needed to feel her, to touch her, just to know that she was there, warm and alive. And one of his hands would always find her there in the bed. And she loved it. It was subconscious thing, something carved so deep into him, that it would never stop amazing her.

She would have to leave the sanctuary of their bed soon. She had few hours to get ready and go to the base. There was a scheduled mission coming soon. Her mission.

Sam knew it was still very difficult for him to see her on going through the Gate. The first few times he had freaked out. It wasn't anything usual, not for him. But it happened anyway. He kept on pacing his office, her lab, the control room, the briefing room… he just wouldn't calm down till she got back. And that freaked him out in the end even more. He had lost control.

They talked about it and it looked better. But then she got into troubles. And after being rescued, she got home late. He was waiting there, panicking. He almost crushed her in a desperate hug. He searched her for injuries, scratches, stitches, for anything…. And he couldn't find a single thing. She didn't know what to do back then. One part of her wanted to scream, the other one wanted to laugh and the other one just wanted to hug him and never let him go. He was so desperately trying not to worry, not to think about the worst but somehow not being out there with her was scaring him.

He had stayed on the base in the time of her next few missions. And then finally he talked to Mary about this. She was helping him with all his issues, with distinguishing the truth from the false memories. But it was still difficult for him to come to her and talk about this. But she helped anyway.

Today the mission would be really easy. They were visiting old friends, it would be just about talking, taking looks at the technology, having dinner and leaving.

She was hoping that he would follow Mary's advice and use that day for something he loved.

Sam had to get up but the grip on her hip was suddenly a bit tighter. And then the fingers started to caress her skin. She just smiled and moved closer to him. She kissed him, sweetly, deeply, trying to pour all the love and affection into that simple act of love. Then, finally, he opened his eyes.

"Hey, beautiful…"

"Good morning."

"Hope you are not planning on leaving without breakfast."

"Jack…"

"No arguing…"

And he kissed her again. And he tickled her. And made her laugh. And then after another sensual kiss he made her grin. He got up and took a shower while she was just lying there on the bed, resting, feeling happy and cared for. These pure kind moments were definitely those she would always cherish the most. Nothing would be there between them. They would always be just Jack and Sam in those. And that was the best possible option.

Dressed in old faded jeans he suddenly appeared at the door of their bedroom.

"Carter…?"

"What?"

"You fell asleep again…" And he was grinning while saying so.

"Nope." Oh she was so busted!

"Take a shower, breakfast is almost ready."

And blushing, she just nodded at him. What a beautiful morning this was!

Back in the kitchen Jack was grinning. He thought he had known Carter. But he was mistaken. She had many sides, many of her cute quirks and one lifetime wouldn't be enough to know them all. For example he would have never thought that she liked to be lazy in the morning on Saturdays. She would be up before him, usually. But she would stay in the bed, her face nuzzled in the pillow or into his body, preferably chest. The first few times she had done that were a bit confusing. But then he understood. She didn't need to talk or anything like that. She just simply liked to be there in the bed on Saturday morning.

Or for example, she was a dreamer. Sometimes she would get lost in her thoughts and her face would get this dreamy look. And then she would just blush a bit while being disturbed and smile shyly…

And his favorite one was that she had fallen in love with lazy evenings on the couch. Oh yes, that was definitely something he could only love and be thankful for.

Now she sneaked her arms around his torso and kissed his bare back.

"Smells good…"

"It's just a coffee and few toasts with butter and cheese…"

"No, nope… Smells good…"

And she nuzzled her nose into his back again. Oh! His ego didn't need that boost but it was very pleasant anyway. He could just chuckle. Cute morning Carter was very adorable Carter.

"Let's eat…"

She let him go and they made their way to the table. They had their breakfast, talking about the mission and about Daniel and his progress and about anything that was on their minds.

Sam knew she should be trying to focus a bit more but she just couldn't. This man could be so damn distracting! Besides suddenly there was this warm feeling spreading through her. She stopped eating, the cup of coffee still in her hand. The realization hit her then. This was home. It was not just a house, their house anymore. This was home, real home. The one and only home.

It felt so natural to be there with Jack, having breakfast, talking about plumbing and gardening and groceries and about their friends and actually about anything they wanted to talk about. It was perfect. She was for once in her life happy. And it was for real, no illusion, no simulation, no lies. Just the pure reality. She was home, she was loved and she was happy.

Sam smiled, finished her coffee and then got up. She hadn't noticed Jack watching her curiously.

She changed and got ready to leave. He wasn't about to go with her. It was part of the deal.

"Hey, you wanna tell me what got you so … lost?"

"When?"

"While having breakfast… you just stopped eating and your coffee…"

"Oh that…"

"Well?"

"It's silly…"

"Wanna tell me?" Who would have the ability to say no to those eyes anyway?

"I just realized how happy I was. How happy I am." She came closer and sneaked her arms around his neck. He locked her in his embrace and smiled genuinely at her.

"This is my home, Jack. _This is_ home. And I know you love me and you care for me and I am so happy…"

"Hey, you okay?"

"Yes I just…"

"What brought this on?"

"I don't know… I was just thinking…"

"You sure you are not trying to tell me that you have some horrible disease or that you're going somewhere very dangerous?"

"No…" She chuckled. He was… crazy. He was Jack. He was her Jack!

"I'm just happy. Because of you."

And that he could grasp and accept. So he kissed her, he made her head spin and knees go weak. She would leave him soon after all so he had to make sure she would know she had to come back to him, that he would be waiting for her.

"I love you."

"I know… Carter, I know…"

And he stepped away. He had to. Otherwise he would be able to stop her from leaving. And they both knew it.

"The time difference is huge and we don't really know if they're going to ask us to stay or not… so don't wait, okay? I might be gone for a day or two."

And she stopped him from responding by placing a finger across his lips. He nodded. He had to. She could be an angel but sometimes… She kissed him gently for one last time and then walked away.

Jack felt a bit like an idiot. He had been struggling with this particular feeling recently. Somehow it happened that now Sam was going on more off-world missions than he was. It was strange. His were dangerous, usual, all from nothing to escaping from prison after being tortured. But hers were… without him. He knew that she had been ready for some time to kick him for thinking about it like this.. oh yeah, he knew.

They had talked about this after all. They had to let the other one go and then come back. They couldn't be everywhere…

After talking to Mary about this, which much to his dismay had helped a lot to come to terms with this situation, he knew he should have a plan. And for once he even had one.

There was this bistro, small restaurant, just by the highway. And he hadn't been there in a while. Maybe a little trip would be beneficial, wouldn't it? He could stop by the shopping centre and buy the groceries. Besides he had one very important stop to make. An appointment he didn't want to miss.

So he cleaned up after the breakfast, put some decent clothes on, took his truck and with a smile on his face left Colorado Springs. He could already smell the delicious pie and coffee. Oh yes, that sounded really good.

The day was nice, it was a perfect day for a short trip.

He made his errand first. And he was really happy about the outcome. One certain woman would be thrilled pretty soon. Hopefully. It was a bit bold move for him to make. He wasn't sure if it was right or not but well, he had to take a little risk every now and then, hm?

He entered the little restaurant and was immediately spotted by the owner – his friend – Sunny. Jack smiled at him and walked over.

"Sunny, hey…"

"Charms! Hey… you didn't call…"

"Do I have to call when I want to visit my old friend?"

"Who's old?" Sunny asked him back.

Sunny knew that without a call this was just a regular visit. Jack sat down to the bar, to the side so he wouldn't be in the way.

"So what do I have to do to get some coffee and pie?"

Sunny grinned at him and called for his wife, Annabelle. She came out from the kitchen. When she noticed Jack, she smiled at him and walked over to give him a hug. He kissed her cheek which surprised them both. And he also presented her with a flower.

"Always charming, are you Jack?"

"No, you're just special, Belle."

"Coffee and pie?"

"You really have to ask?" He asked her, smiling. She just smiled back and gave him his favorite treat. Large cup of very good and tasty coffee and big slice of one of her pies with extra cream.

Belle sat down next to Jack to have her own cup of coffee. The restaurant wasn't full and their waitress could do just fine without her.

They talked about some very unimportant stuff and it was a nice conversation. But Belle had the nudging feeling that Jack wanted to talk to them about something. She was trying to summarize all she knew about him, his life, friends and family, anything that could give her at least a small clue. But there was nothing.

"So how are you? But Jack, really… how?"

"I'm fine, Belle, don't worry."

"Really?" She was just suspicious.

Jack looked at her and soon he was grinning, blushing a tiny little bit and he ducked his head to hide the shy smile that he just couldn't wipe out from his face.

And then it hit her. He wasn't trying to lie to her, he wasn't trying to hide anything. He was just himself. And what more, he was trying to be open and honest as much as he could.

"You really are happy, aren't you?" She noted finally.

"I am, I really am."

"With that pretty scientist of yours?" Sunny supplied.

"Matthew!" Belle tried to tell him to shut up. But Jack was still smiling.

"It's okay, Belle."

"Is it?"

"Yeah… besides he's right – almost… she's not pretty, she's gorgeous."

Belle's face seemed to be even happier than before. He was serious!

"So… how are the things, hm?"

And so he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box. Belle's eyes got wide. She couldn't hold back the surprise. He let her open the box. At first she felt a hint of disappointment but then she could just admire the beautiful little piece in her hand. It was stunning and … very well near to simply perfect.

"It's beautiful."

"It's special."

"Special?"

"Yeah… I had it made for her you know?"

"Your idea?"

"Well… Her mum used to have the same one. I used a family picture… and this is it."

"Jack…"

"I love her, Belle. I really do."

And she knew how much that had to cost him – to tell her this. He was a shy private man. He was not talking about his feelings or thoughts. She knew that. She knew him. She had seen him before he had gotten married. She knew him as a married man. She knew Sarah. She knew their little boy… and she would never be able to forget how devastated he had been then. Losing his child almost made him die. She knew that too. And she also knew that something that had happened several years ago made him see new hope for himself. And then he got his team, he found new friends and they helped him to save his soul and heart.

Belle had seen him many times, broken and desperate. Sometimes he would talk about it, sometimes he would not. Sometimes it was about losing somebody, seeing some people suffer or die, it was about pain and desperation he hadn't been able to stop from happening. And sometimes he would come, angry with himself and with the world itself for allowing some things to happen. And sometimes he would come happy, smiling, charming as he knew how to be when he wanted to.

Belle was a smart woman. Since the first moment Jack had started to talk about the woman working with him, she could sense the change in him. And she knew it was good for him to find the beauty of living again. She knew that as military, he would never be able to do anything more than just care about that scientist but soon she understood that the friendship of certain Samantha Carter had been worth a lot to him. He cared, deeply.

When he came to them after the last mission she knew that something terrible had happened. Jack talked to Sunny, asked for advice and help and when he was leaving, he seemed to be even more sad than before. That mission had cost them a lot. He lost his team, his best friend ended up blinded and the woman he had started to love sometimes on the way almost got killed.

She was glad to hear that he had sorted things out with Samantha later. She was sure that those two would be good together. From what she knew, they needed each other and they were deeply in love. However it was very difficult to tell that for sure when it came to Jack and his feelings and thoughts. He could be pretty mysterious sometimes.

But now here he was with the beautiful piece of jewellery, telling her the story. Was it possible? Jack O'Neill, the man that had seen too much, been put through more than enough and had survived it all, the sarcastic and kind and charming man was in love and it was strong enough to let him admit it out loud.

She got up and hugged him again. She was just too happy for him to stay put.

"Are you going to tell us more about her?"

"Well I was thinking…."

"What?"

"She's …. working now but maybe next week or so I could make her to take some time off… and you know, go for a little trip with me."

"She loves pies?"

"She loves jell-o but trust me, she's going to fall for pies when she tastes yours."

Belle just smacked his arm playfully. She left him sitting there and went back to work. Jack talked to Sunny some more, they talked about their mutual friends, they talked about many different things from sports through weather to fishing and after third huge piece of pie and second large cup of coffee, Jack said goodbye and walked away. He wanted to get back home on time. Maybe he would be lucky and Sam would get back soon. Besides, he had some things to take care of and those were better done without her in the house.

Belle came to Sunny and sneaked her arms around his torso. He kissed her lovingly. She was the best thing that had ever happened to him.

"He's serious, isn't he?"

"I think he is…"

"I can't remember the last time when he looked like that, Annabelle. Maybe when Charlie was born but …"

"She's what he needs."

"I just hope it's the same for her."

"You think it's not?"

"I don't know… It's just…"

"I know, dear, I know. You care about them all… I know."

"Is it wrong?"

"It had never been wrong."

"I really hope this works out…"

"We will see, soon. He will bring her here and we can all talk and … see."

"I love you."

She smiled and left him to lock the door and close all the blinds. It was time to go to bed soon. She was tired. And her heart was filled with happiness and something warm and beautiful. She knew all the boys and seeing any of them happy like this would always make her proud.

Jack got home safely. He got a call from Janet. They talked a bit about Cassie and the planned visit the next weekend. He was already looking forward to that. And in the end she just, as by the way, told him that SG-7 had contacted the SGC. They would be home in few hours, all of them safe and unharmed.

"Eh… thanks for letting me know doc."

"Sir, it's okay. I understand. No need to pretend around me."

"Fraiser…"

"If you think I have never been worried about you, waiting for any possible information, you are wrong. I can totally understand, okay? Just accept it!" She told him, the genuine laughter in her voice making her sound even more friendly and gentle than usually.

"Thanks, doc."

"You're welcome, Sir."

"Give Cassie a kiss from me, will ya?"

"Sure."

And they ended the call, smiling and feeling just a little bit sheepish. Grown-ups, yeah.

Few hours later when Sam got home, well it was actually almost the next morning, she had been surprised. The house was clean, absolutely. She tiptoed silently to the kitchen only to find a note there saying "Mission 'groceries' completed." She had to grin then. She opened the fridge to find it stuffed. And there among all was even her favorite yoghurt. This was heaven.

She walked into the bedroom silently. She didn't want to wake Jack up. But the room was empty. That was weird… She checked out the bathroom. She could still smell his shower gel in there. Oh she could stay there enveloped in that scent forever. But the real thing was definitely better so she decided to continue with her search for Jack.

She noticed a blanket on the couch in the living room. And one big soft pillow. He slept on the couch? Why? Was he waiting for her? She hoped not. He knew she could be getting home really late. Anything could have happened… unless… Unless he had some intel from certain doc from the base. So he was waiting for her. That was sooo cute.

She couldn't resist it, she just lied down. The mission went well but in the end they got stuck for a few hours and then the medical check-out and preliminary report… she was exhausted. She just fell down onto the couch and snuggled into the cushions.

The next thing she remembered was the feeling of being covered with a blanket. And then how somebody had took off her socks.

When she woke up she felt rested and very refreshed. Well, she was still dressed in her casual clothes but the nap was perfect. She checked the time then and got really surprised. It was late in the afternoon! She slept through the day…!

"Hey there sleeping beauty…"

She turned around to see Jack standing there. She smiled at him. He sat down next to her and let her snuggle into his chest. They found a very comfortable position then.

"I slept whole day!"

"You did… you needed it."

"I couldn't find you in the morning… but I found the pillow here…"

"Well because you hadn't come back in the evening I crashed here and then decided to go for some fresh bread and rolls in the morning. When I got back, I found you sleeping here…"

"So… what have you been up to, hm?"

"You know what, go, take a shower, I'll finish the dinner and we can be lazy and we can talk later…"

At first she wanted to argue but then he kissed her and she could just nod and smile. Besides she could definitely use the shower, that was for sure. However she couldn't just get up that easily… she needed a minute. Actually, she didn't want to move or get up. She was quite comfortable right where she was.

"Feeling lazy, Carter?" He couldn't keep the amusement from his voice. He was enjoying the fact that she liked to cuddle. A lot.

"Maybe… you mind?"

"No… definitely not."

"Good."

"But it may cause a slight problem with our fire alarm in the kitchen soon…"

It took her a minute to figure this out but then she understood. Whoops. He was cooking! Then she remembered, he was finishing the dinner for them. With a disapproving growl she let him get up. He disappeared into the kitchen to finish their dinner.

Sam woke up fully few minutes later and she just kept on watching him move around the kitchen. It was a very nice image actually. He finished and noticed her staring at him, obviously enjoying the view.

"What?"

"Nothing…"

"Carter… you're staring at me."

"Yes… you mind?"

"You like what you see?"

With a smile she got up, walked to him, gave him a very sensual kiss and then went to finally take the shower. And it felt good. In the meanwhile Jack set up the table. She came back ten minutes later, looking refreshed and quite content. They had their dinner together, they talked and laughed together, it was nice. After dinner she asked about the possibility of having a dessert.

"Dessert, huh?"

"Yes… something… creamy."

"Tiramisu for example?"

"That's evil, Jack. So tempting…"

"Go, make yourself comfortable in the living room again, okay?"

"What?"

"Shoo, go go…"

And soon he joined her there with one big bowl of Tiramisu and two spoons.

"You have Tiramisu…"

"I stopped by this miraculous Italian place on my way home in the afternoon while you were still sleeping…"

"I love you."

"Hope you're not saying that just because I brought you the Tiramisu."

"No, there's more to it… you also cook pretty well. And I'm sure I could think of some more rather pleasant qualities you have as well… later."

Before he had a chance to dig in and taste the delicious sweet thing, another delicious sweet thing attacked him, brought him closer, hugged him and kissed him. And what a kiss that was.

"What was that for?"

"No reason…" She kissed him again and then dug into the dessert.

"So what have you been up to?" She managed to ask after torturing him by enjoying very openly few spoons of the creamy sweet thing he had brought for her.

"I had my plans you know…"

"Wanna share?"

"Maybe…"

"Come on! I'm curious…" She smacked him playfully. He was teasing her after all.

"Okay… so I had some errands to make… and I went to see a friend. A very good friend."

"Someone I know?"

"Not exactly."

"Not exactly?"

"Sam, do you have any plans for the next weekend?"

"No, why?" His half serious tone got her attention.

"Would you want to come with me to visit a friend?"

"Does this friend have a name?"

She noticed that he was a bit nervous. She couldn't understand though. Why would he be so nervous about a friend? They decided to share their thoughts, fears, secrets and past a long time ago. It was a difficult path for the both of them but so far it looked like it was working for them. So it had to be something very deep and very personal for him to be nervous like that.

"Jack, is this about the part of your life I know very little about?" She didn't know how else to approach the subject of his dark former army years.

"Yeah. You can say that."

"Jack what brought this on?"

He put the Tiramisu aside and let Sam move on the couch so she was facing him. He reached for her hand then. It scared her a bit but on the other side, it was really good that he was reaching out for her when he needed her.

"I want you to meet somebody. My former CO. His name is Matt Irving, he's retired General. He has this place, this little restaurant by the highway. It's not far from Springs but it's not really close either. They have some pretty good sandwiches there. He runs the place with his wife, Annabelle. She makes the best pies ever."

"Tell me more…" He smiled at her then and let her snuggle closer.

"Okay, but a question first. Did you or did you not hack into my files when we started to work together?"

"Jack..."

"I'm not gonna be pissed at you, Sam. I figured it long ago. I just want to know how much do you know. Just tell me, it's okay…"

"Okay… yes, I hacked into your file. I just had to know of what you were capable of that time. But I opened it, read the list of your awards and medals and that was it."

"What?"

"I just couldn't, Jack. I haven't even finished the list…"

"Sam…"

"No, look. It was a stupid thing to do. And I realized it and I stopped. I just wished that one day you would trust me enough, that we would be close enough that you would tell me, share it with me."

"I thought you knew, I thought you read it…"

He didn't know if he wanted to kiss her there or be angry. She was looking embarrassed and her lip was trembling, she was nervous.

"I love you."

He reached for her and kissed her. They laughed together and talked some more. He told her some things about Sunny and Belle, about the restaurant and soon she understood that these people were not just part of his past, but also part of his present and future. They really were his friends. He needed them, he trusted them.

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><p><em>AN: So what do you think about the start, huh? More will come later, next chapter is ready and more are in-progress :o)_


	3. So she met them

_**A/N:** Hiya2000 - you have the PMs disabled so - here is reply to your review - thank you for it!__ I'm glad you like this story so far. It just felt right to write this one and I really wanted to. I hope I will finish it soon. I promised myself that I would, before the really rough time starts. And before my vacation (I haven't had real vacation in two years and I'm really looking forward to it)._

_And all of you - thank you for the alerts, messages and reviews - you made me smile - all of you - thanks :o) This story will be rather short and more like a closure to the Ladybug than anything else... hope you're gonna like it :o) Your ideas and thoughts are always dearly appreciated. I know - some parts might be a bit out of character but hopefully it's gonna be okay!  
><em>

_Some of you wrote me about the thing Jack did - having something made specially for Sam - there's more to it... so much more! I hope you're not gonna be disappointed :o) Remember - I'm always full of surprises :o)) Enjoy!  
><em>

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><p><strong>So she met them<strong>

The week was gone rather quickly. Soon it was time for them to pack and go. At first they wanted to take bikes and enjoy the ride but the weather had decided to play tricky. So they opted for a truck, nice music to listen, coffee, sandwiches, Sam found some nice rest stops and as a little bonus nice cabin where they would spend the night. Their little romantic weekend. Somehow it was so surreal and somehow it seemed perfect.

Jack wasn't really sure about it but one conversation about the possibilities of cozy place with big bed, rugs in front of the fireplace, big bathtub in the bathroom and he seemed to change his mind. Besides - spending time with Carter? Nothing could stop him.

In the end it actually sounded pretty nice to both of them. Just the two of them, nature, road, no disturbing. Lots of time to talk, to be silent, just to be together. Besides, Jack was about to introduce the love of his life to some very important people. He was just hoping it would all work out just nicely.

"So you ready?"

"Yeah… sure."

"Jack? What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"You're worried?"

"No, just seeing you dressed like that… wow…"

He was teasing her! She wasn't wearing anything special, just her favorite jeans, white blouse and of course, she had her leather jacket with her among many other packed things. She picked the cabin for their night stay for a reason.

"Come on, let's go."

And so they got on their way. They stopped by several places, bought few things and were really glad that they had decided to take the car because it was raining heavily by the time they reached Sunny's restaurant. They would have been soaked through on their bikes!

"So… delicious pies?"

"Delicious pies." He smiled at her.

"And rest rooms?"

"What?" He was confused.

"Jack, I need to go to a restroom." She was actually grinning at him. He really was nervous! It almost felt like he was about to introduce her to his parents, not just friends.

"Just behind the corner, the entrance is from the outside."

"Okay. I'll meet you inside then."

"All right."

And so she went to the rest room and he went inside. The place was not full but as usually not empty either. He spotted Sunny and walked over to him. He had few empty seats by there with the label Reserved. That was cute. Looked like they were looking forward to this little meeting as much as he was…

"Charms!"

"Hey Sunny!"

"You made it… alone?"

"No, not alone. She'll be here in a minute." He reassured him.

"I can't wait to meet her…" Belle appeared and Jack gave her a hug.

"Hey, Belle. How are you?"

"Anxious to meet your lovely genius."

They sat down together, Sunny's young cook taking over the kitchen for him for a moment. And their waiter would do just fine taking care of the restaurant for them as well.

"You have help here, he's new?"

"Yeah but he's good. Young but learning…"

"But why?"

"I'm not getting any younger…"

They laughed together. The waiter brought pies and coffees to them. Belle was pretty amused when Jack ordered coffee for Sam. He didn't hesitate.

"You know how she likes her coffee?"

"Sure he does…" Sam suddenly answered for him, standing right next to him. She felt three pairs of eyes upon her, curious and searching.

Jack got up, put his hand around her and before he could think it through, he kissed her face. She leaned into him which didn't go unnoticed by the other two occupants of the table.

"Hey… everything okay?"

"Yeah, you just gotta pick which pie would you like to try." Jack supplied.

"Well maybe the lady of the house can help me out… I heard you make delicious pies." Sam looked at Belle with a smile, trying not to feel like being introduced to a possible mother-in-law.

"By the way, hi and I'm…"

"Samantha."

"Yes."

"So nice to meet you finally. I've heard a lot about you. I'm Annabelle and this big guy over here is my husband, Matthew." He looked at Sam then with, how else than with a smile. Something in her clicked and made her stand straight, in alert, full attention mode.

"Sir."

"Oh come on, don't call me Sir, I've retired a long ago."

"Sorry, force of habit."

"Yeah, that's okay. Call me Matt or Sunny, all right?"

"Sunny? Your… eh, nick-name?"

"Yes, you can say that."

"Come on, Carter, stop with the questions, sit down, have your coffee and eat your pie."

"Shush, you. Be nice. She doesn't have her pie yet…"

She smiled at him sweetly and he knew he was lost. He had just introduced one vixen to another. No, that wouldn't end well, would it? Did Sam feel like this when he had started to spend more time with Jacob? Wow. What a feeling.

They all sat down anyway, Sam asked Belle for a pie and she let her pick. Jack supplied that anything with chocolate would be just fine. Through the whole time he just kept on smiling, grinning.

Both Belle and Sunny noticed the way Sam was leaning against Jack, sitting close to him, he had arm around her shoulders, well mostly, and if Belle could see well, she'd say that one of Sam's hands was on Jack's knee. They were so obviously in love that it made her heart swell in pride.

"Oh, we have something for you." Sam said. "It's still in the car though."

"Lemme get it, Carter." Jack told her almost automatically.

"Okay…"

Jack then got up and left her there. He knew that Belle would want to talk to her in private, he was sure that Sunny would find a reason why to leave them alone. And that he did. Actually, maybe it was not his idea in the first place. His young help in the kitchen needed help. He excused himself and let them talk.

"That was subtle…" Sam commented. Belle just smiled at her.

"You know Belle, Jack really cares about you, both of you."

"Did he talk to you about him and Matt? About their times…"

"He did…"

"He trusts you."

"I hope so."

"He also loves you dearly."

"I know that, believe me, I know."

"I'm sorry… it's just…"

"Don't be. I understand it. Really." And they shared a knowing smile. They both obviously cared or the silver-haired Colonel. "You've known him for a very long time, right?"

"Yes. Since he was a very young man. They just put the unit together and Sunny was telling me about the guys. And accidentally we met Jack in town. He saluted and then bought me a single flower."

"What?"

"Yeah, there was one of those flower girls walking around and he just stopped her and bought me a flower."

"It actually sounds like him… he can be quite a gentleman if he wants to be."

"Who? Someone I know?" Jack appeared behind them and sat down next to Sam again.

"You." Sam said softly.

Belle noticed Jack's eyes changing. They seemed to get even warmer than usually, their color changed a bit. He reached for Sam, caressed her face and kissed her sweetly. She leaned into him and let him drop another kiss to her hair. Belle couldn't hold back the happiness flowing through her veins. The sight in front of her was something she thought she would never see.

Sam was the first one to smile sheepishly at Belle. Jack reached for the bag and gave it to Belle.

"What is this?"

"A present."

"A present?"

"Yes. This little scientist over here thought it would be nice not to come empty-handed."

"Samantha! You shouldn't have…" Belle smiled at her though and opened the box. She found a set of new paints and brushes there. Also some very beautiful photographs of flowers and trees.

"Jack told me you like to paint nature so…"

"It's beautiful, very beautiful. Thank you."

"And of course I have another thing for you…" And he presented her with a single flower.

"Thank you, charming as usually." Belle looked meaningfully at Sam. And as she suspected, the brilliant women she started to like about an hour and half ago, had picked up on it.

"That's your code-name, isn't it? Something to do with you being charming…" Sam told him.

"Oh… I know this look."

"What look?"

"This look you have, this Carter being in full exploration scientific excited mode…" Jack told her, grinning. He just couldn't help it! Sam smacked his arm gently, making Belle laugh.

"So … are you going to tell me or do I have to ask your boss?"

"Carter…"

"Come on, tell me…"

"Charms, come on and help me…" Sunny appeared and practically dragged Jack away from them. He thanked him for saving his ass back there. But they both knew he would have some explaining to do.

"Charms?"

"Yes."

"What did he do?" She asked, disbelieving and surprised.

"He was charming…"

"So what… he used his eyes and smile and I guess pretty hot young Air Force body to charm some woman somewhere important?"

"You're very close."

And so Belle told her what she knew about the origin of Jack's code-name. They laughed a great deal about it. Sam looked over only to find Jack wearing an apron, standing behind the grill, talking to Sunny, laughing and occasionally looking over at her. Sam really liked this day so far.

"You're right, it really do sound like him. Especially the combination of women and cake."

"You sound like you've seen him … ehm…"

"In action?" Both laughed at that.

"What happened? Well, if you can tell me…"

"No cover stories needed with this one."

"So?" And she seemed anxious to know.

"So we were on a mission. Let's leave the location unspecified. And there was this village of natives. They seemed friendly. There was this woman and she offered him something to drink and a pie or cake or whatever it was. So they talked and smiled and he tasted the thing… and later when he woke up, he realized that she had drugged him and sort of married him."

Belle was really laughing then, seeing Sam telling that story. It was nice to hear something about Jack. In the next half hour they traded stories about him, enjoying every minute of it.

In the meantime Sunny was talking to Jack, about many different things but mostly about Sam.

"So she knows about your past? I mean about the time before you two started working together."

"Yes, she knows about most of it…"

"And how that feels?"

"Usually pretty good… but sometimes it's kind of scary."

"I bet it is." And they laughed together.

"So… you serious about this relationship?"

"Yeah, I am. I love her, Sunny, I really do."

"That's good…" Sunny smiled at him. "She can handle you…"

"Oh yes, she can… you have no idea."

And Sunny couldn't be happier. It really did seem just okay and well. It was obvious those two were really in love. It was not a fling, it was not something temporary, they were serious about it.

"You know what? If I were you, I would get back there…"

"Why?"

"Charms… look at them. We're both in troubles. But I'd say mostly you…"

So with some sandwiches and more coffee they walked back.

"Hey ladies…" Jack greeted them. Sam smiled at him and reached for him. He sat down next to her and put a strand of her hair behind her ear.

"So what are you two up to?"

"We? Nothing of course…"

"You are a bad liar, Carter." He told her but she just smiled at him sweetly and he could do nothing else but to kiss her. She leaned into it and held onto him for a moment, very long beautiful moment. It used to feel so strange, being so open at public but not anymore. Now it was a natural thing to them. They had nothing to fear. Just each other to love.

"We were of course discussing you, Jack. You know, trading stories…" Belle supplied.

"And I'm sure that at least Daniel and Cassie will be really thrilled to hear some of them." Carter told him. Jack's eyes got wide. He couldn't believe it!

"You wouldn't…"

"Try me…" She dared him. Belle and Sunny were near to laughter then. The moment was destroyed by Sam's phone ringing. She excused herself and looked at the caller ID.

"It's Cass… sorry, be right back." And with a smile she took the call and stepped away.

"Jack… what about the...?" She was afraid to finish that thought out loud.

"I haven't given to her yet." He caught up pretty quickly. Of course he would know what she had on her mind.

"Why… you're waiting for some special occasion?" Belle asked with mischievous tone in her voice.

"Maybe… "

"Maybe?"

"I don't know… not yet, Belle. I don't want to screw this up..." He told them then. Belle just nodded, hugged him and wished him good luck. Sam came back then and Belle hugged her as well.

"You take care of yourself, you hear me?"

"Of course."

"And you take care of him…" Belle added. The only thing Jack managed to say was one 'hey' before Sunny just slapped him over his shoulder in compassion.

"I will."

"And you young man should appear here again sooner than next year, okay?" Belle told Jack. He just smiled at her and then winked at Carter. Oh, he was having a plan, wasn't he?

"Don't worry. It was good to see you."

"Yeah, I'm glad you two came. It was a pleasure meeting you, Sam."

"That feeling is mutual, Sir… Oh crap, sorry! It really _is_ a habit." She looked a bit frustrated by her inability to stop calling him Sir. But the military in both of them was just making it so easy to add the Sir where it was supposed to be.

"How deep does that habit go? I'm just curious…" And he seemed honest.

"Well, you know what I did, well what I do for living, more or less, and then you know with whom I'm living and well, my father is one retired Air Force General. Take your pick." Sam told him and it made him chuckle.

"Point taken. One tough girl, I see."

"Only sometimes…" She winked at him. It was easy to talk to this guy. She really liked him. She knew there was a lot more into him. But she could understand. And it seemed that he was actually aware of that.

"Come on, give old man a hug."

"Hey since when you're old?" Jack chipped in. Sunny just gave him a look. Sam hugged him and thanked him for being nice.

"Sir, thank you for everything else as well." She whispered into his ear. And then she looked him deep into his eyes. And he got the message. This smart beautiful woman just thanked him for all that had happened in the past. She was thanking him for Jack.

"Drive carefully."

"We will."

And with some bags full of food they left the small restaurant. Both Sunny and Belle seemed to be happy with the outcome of this little afternoon coffee meeting.

"They are happy together."

"So you'll stop worrying now?"

"She is really nice, I know… okay okay..."

"Yes, she is. And she told me some really good stories about our Jack."

"They really have a history, don't they?"

"In more than just one way…"

At that Sunny could only smile and then get back to work. They had a restaurant to run after all! Yes, they were sure that Jack had indeed found the right woman to be with him, next to him, to share his life with him.

In the meantime Sam was driving Jack's car towards him unknown destination. He had no idea where their cabin was. She just wouldn't tell him.

"Jack…"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for introducing us."

"Ha, you're just happy that Belle told you some stories so you can blackmail me now…" He smirked jokingly.

"I have other ways…" She was teasing him!

"I mean it, Jack. I'm really glad I met them. And I know it means a lot to you so… I'm just saying."

"Okay… I'm glad."

"You were nervous, weren't you…" She asked gently.

"Yeah… yeah, I was. But if you tell anyone…"

"Your secret is safe with me." And with some more friendly banter and lots of talking they made their way to the cabin Sam had picked up for some unknown reason. She made him stay in the car when she stopped by one house to get their keys. He felt like being kidnapped a bit. But he liked every single second of it.

"So where are we going now?"

"Just up the road…"

"And are you going to tell me what is about all this?"

"Okay, take a guess."

"Carter."

"No, take a guess."

"All right, I will wait but you are going to tell me eventually, aren't you?"

She just reached over and kissed him. She drove over to one beautiful house, little bigger than an average cabin. It was all wood and warm white color, windows with blinds, with a porch and one of those really pretty bench-swings placed there.

Jack looked at Sam but she just motioned to him to go and see for himself. A little suspicious he exited the car and waited for her. She threw him the keys and let him wander around. He found few benches in the neatly cut bushes around, he found some nice lamps, hammock and lanterns. The grass all around the place was well taken care of. He followed a path around the house and found himself behind it, by nice small lake with another bench, backyard patio and some more lamps and lanterns.

Sam followed him there and he took her into his arms. It was one big hug, gentle and full of love.

"So you like it so far?"

"Yes…"

"Come, let's see it inside."

And she knew that he would like it. She let him go first. He was really surprised. The interior was cozy, warm and welcoming. Little kitchen, living room with the promised fireplace and rugs, lots of pillows and very comfortably looking couch.

"Bathroom and bedroom?"

"Upstairs. There is also a spare room but we won't probably need that one."

"Carter…"

"Let's bring our things."

"Can't they wait?" He was only half-jokingly annoyed.

"Trust me…" And that he could do.

They brought their stuff in together, Jack put their bags upstairs, Sam fixed them some snack, it was all really comfortable. They met in the living room and enjoyed their time there, eating, talking, sitting close, touching, holding hands. It was warm and very welcomed.

"So … what do we do now, Carter? You have any plans?" He asked while holding her and playing with her hair. He knew she loved while he was doing that. And well, he loved it too.

"Well, I was thinking about taking a shower. I could really use it…"

"Oh, okay…" He reluctantly moved away from her and let her get up.

"You're not coming?" She smiled at him. Jack could just grin at her. She had these playful sides and he was only on the beginning of his journey to discover them all. If it was possible, he was falling for her, more and more every day. It was somehow scary but on the other hand... he was one happy guy. Satisfied and content with his life. There she was, by one word amazing, smiling at him, waiting for him to join her. And even before they reached the stairs, they were locked in each other's arms, holding, caressing, both trying to get lost in one heated passionate kiss.

Much, much later they were lying together in the bed. Jack was half sitting, propped against the headboard of the bed. Sam was curled into his side, snuggling close. There was a huge window at the bedroom and thanks to it, the moonlight was coming in there, illuminating the room.

"You gonna tell me now?"

"What?"

"Sam, you brought me here to do what exactly?"

"I just thought that maybe we could use this little trip to have some really nice time alone."

"So you planned this so you could seduce me?" He asked, shocked and unsure of her reaction. She just nodded against his chest and kissed one of his scars there. She acted like it was absolutely normal and obvious that she would organize this so they could be together like this.

"I love you…" He told her then and brought her face closer to his for another, more proper kiss.

"I've got something for you."

"You do?"

"Yes…"

He then opened the drawer in the night-stand and found a little box there. He gave it to her.

"Jack what is this?"

"Open it." And that she did. And she was unable to talk when she realized what she was looking at.

"How…?"

"You showed me a picture where your mom was wearing this. And you seemed to really love the memory. Jacob told me about it then."

"But they never found it. After the crash they just …"

"I know that… I had this one made for you."

"Jack..."

She couldn't believe it. He just gave her a necklace, one perfect copy of her mother's most favorite and most beautiful necklace. Small, elegant, delicate pendant, on very thin chain, perfect by one word. She asked him to help her to put it on. And when he did so, he had to take a look at her.

And there she was, gorgeous as usually, this time naked, barely covered with the light blanket, with her eyes shining, skin flushed, her hair going crazy, with the beautiful piece of jewelry around her neck. She looked like a goddess. No, better.

"So… is there a reason for this? Special occasion?"

"Do I need a reason if I want to give you a present?" He asked her and they both knew he was not joking around. It was not the first present he had given her but there was indeed something special about this one.

"You know you don't… but this is… just too much."

"Carter…"

"You know, you could easily tell me something now or perhaps ask something…" Very subtle, Sam... she thought.

"Ask?" He tried to play dumb but knew better than to think it would work.

"Yes, ask… Jack, I'm really moved right now, my feelings and thoughts are all over this place… " And she didn't know how else to put it... she could feel her racing heartbeat then.

"You mean like … ask you that… _that_ something." He smirked.

"Jack?"

"Hmmm… so I could ask for anything now… even for you to do the most stupidest thing on the planet and marry me?" He was asking jokingly but his eyes were sparkling, she could see the depths of his emotions, she could see his soul. He was being serious. At least partially.

"You can ask anything…"

"Naaah, that's too bad. Because I don't know if we are there yet and this is one thing I really don't want to screw up. Besides what if I ask you and you say no?"

"What if I say yes?"

"Are you saying yes?"

"Are you asking me?"

"Do you want me to ask you?"

"Do you want to ask me?"

They were both grinning by then. It was good to know that even after all that they still had it in themselves. They still could be annoying and bickering all the time, driving each other nuts.

"I can't ask you now… what if you say yes? Then what?"

"Then my mother's necklace would serve us as … engagement jewellery."

"Can't do that, Carter."

"Why?"

"If that role goes to this piece… what am I going to do with the ring I have hidden back in Springs?"

He was teasing her, trying to lead her from this line of questions somewhere else. He tried to tickle her and to distract her but she didn't give him a chance. Soon he found himself lying on the bed, pinned to the mattress by one Samantha Carter.

"That can't happen."

"How so?"

"That ring is no longer hidden…"

"What?" He really didn't expect that.

"Really? You think that if you put something into your shoes and leave it there, it won't fall out? Especially while somebody is cleaning around the house and finds your shoes hidden in the bathroom where they are not supposed to be?"

"You found the ring." And that was not a question.

"I found the ring." She told him softly. He didn't seem to be angry, just a bit confused.

"Do you know now, why I took you here, _Sir_?" She really enjoyed saying the Sir this time.

"Are you saying…?"

"I thought, I was hoping that you were just working up the nerve to ask me." There, she said it... And he was silent for one of the longest moments of their lives.

"So?"

"So when you do and yes I'm saying when and not if, and when I agree and then when we are married, we will need a place for our honeymoon. But we both know how lucky we are and we both know how much can Cassie be worried these days so… I was thinking that we could start looking for a really nice place not that far away from Springs where we would just… enjoy each other."

"I might ask you to repeat this because you were speaking so fast that I haven't heard most of it…" He was teasing… She smacked him playfully.

"So, Carter… you apparently brought me here for more than just seducing me."

"Maybe…" She admitted.

"Did you take the ring along?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Jack the fact that I found it doesn't mean that I will force you into this."

"You could have fooled me…"

"Jack…"

"Just kidding, Carter."

"And I didn't want to steal you your moment…"

"Sam…" And she couldn't decipher the tone of his voice this time.

"So you were just working up the nerve?"

"I thought that we should talk about it and decide together."

"So why the ring?"

"I just saw it one day and it just screamed your name…"

He looked so honest, genuine and frustrated that she could do nothing else but kiss him.

"So… are we going to talk about it now?"

"You want to?"

"Hmmm... Later…"

And with mischievous smile she kissed him again and managed with no real problem to seduce him again.

Then when the early morning came, Sam woke up in Jack's arms. She felt safe and protected, loved and cared for. And with the perfect copy of her mother's necklace around her neck, she felt also something new, a sensation. She loved it very much. And having it associated with Jack... she couldn't have asked for more...

When she looked up, she found Jack looking down at her, smiling, enjoying the view obviously. It took them some time to wake fully in that early morning hour though. There was no rush, no other place where to be.

Without a word Jack pulled out the ring then. Oh yes, he took it along.

He saw her eyes going wide the first moment. Then their color turned into much softer one, as did her expression. She just nodded at him, her lips trembling and some very happy tears threatening to fall, giving him permission and silently agreeing. And so he, slowly and carefully, slipped the ring on her finger. He kissed it right there, as if he was trying to seal the deal.

No words were said, she pulled him down for a kiss and then snuggled to his side. His fingers were drawing lazy circles on her back and she was enjoying it.

"Hey, Sam…"

"Yes?"

"If this is how trying the possible honeymoon places looks like, I'd say we have to try more of them if we want to decide, what do you think?"

"More of them?"

He took in her appearance, the sheet around her, her hair on the pillow, shame she was already naked because he would surely be undressing her with his eyes by then. With a smile he noticed the blush that was creeping up her neck under his gaze. Cute and gorgeous, brilliant... simply Samantha Carter, the one and only. His.

"Jack?"

"Shh… I'm thinking."

Then with a smile he kissed her and they, together, after yet another sensual lovemaking in the glow of the rising sun, fell asleep, one in each other's arms, feeling happy and content like never before.

* * *

><p><em>AN: so did you see this coming? The proposal - yes, I know, more or less obvious... but still I wanted them to do things differently than normal people, hehe :o)) So what do you think?_


	4. So he got the call

_**A/N:**__ You know why I picked up this name? I love Marvel! I love Avengers and well Jack is sort of Avenger of his own kind – our hero :o)) And it all just somehow seemed to fit. You'll see while reading what I mean by that :o) _

_Of course, I am sorry for the delay, I just didn't manage earlier. I had too much on my plate. And now I am splitting this chapter into two so you could get the update… hope you won't mind._

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><p><strong>So he got the call<strong>

They decided not to tell anyone about the engagement. They were both sure that it would come up eventually on its own. And like this they had the space and ability to be enjoying their little secret. But they both knew that lots of people would be happy for them. After everything they'd been put through, this was their little piece of heaven on Earth.

Back in Springs life was as it used to be. Sam and Jack even managed to go on a mission together. They suspected a little help from… higher authorities but they were definitely not complaining. Ferretti and his team were beyond amused by their behavior. They all knew about the personal relationship of course, but seeing them as team-members was very interesting. Especially given the fact that Jack was using her surname and occasionally even her former rank and she was calling him Sir with that huge smile on her lips. They seemed to be really enjoying it.

"Hey, Jack, you having fun?" Ferretti asked.

"Hell, yeah."

"Was that irony, Sir?"

And at that Jack could just grin. They've been walking about few hours now, Carter was beyond herself, collecting samples, talking with the other scientist on Ferretti's team, the planet had moderate climate, nothing too cold, too hot, too sandy, too muddy… it was actually a perfect recon mission and Jack was supposed to be happy, that it was like that.

"Come on, don't tell me you're actually hoping for something to happen."

"Of course not!"

"Good…"

"Did you just sound very relieved, Ferretti?"

"Sorry, Sir, but your bad luck is …" and at Jack's glare he decided to alter his sentence a bit. "at least as bad as ours so you and Sam on a mission with me and my people… it calls for trouble."

"No, for that we would need Daniel and his smile and greet before getting to know the danger policy."

"Come on, he couldn't be that bad…"

But at this Jack could only glare at him. And Ferretti understood. Daniel was that bad. But Jack came around and they all knew how strong their friendship now was. They just knew that SG-1 used to have its ways how to act and how to do things. And not that he would ever say it out loud, but Ferretti had always been pretty proud that he was one of those coming through the Gate the first time, seeing Jack as the tough bad-ass officer he was and seeing Daniel during his first off-world encounters. Boy he hated that man. But it was difficult to stay angry at him.

"_Sir, come in." She called by the radio._

"What's up, Carter?"

"_I think we might have a problem, Sir." And no, she didn't sound that pleased._

"Care to elaborate?"

"_We found something with Major Jenkins. You should come and see it, Sir. Follow the northern trail, we should be about 10 to 15 minutes ahead of you."_

"Copy that, O'Neill out." He took his hand away from his radio and looked at Ferretti. Oh the told-you-so look was so priceless.

In the end they had to stay for a few days on the planet, the four suns that suddenly came up from nowhere were making it very difficult to move around. Especially given the fact that they were not up all in the same time. There was no nighttime there. Aside of that, few tribes of natives weren't really happy that the SG team appeared. And they let them know about that of course. So all of them excluding Carter got back home wounded. Just scratches and bruises, but still. Sam was just burnt a bit.

General Hammond didn't know whether his people were joking or not. Describing events of this mission made him focus on not laughing out loud. Leave it to those two teams to go on a mission together and came back like that. Their clothes torn from walking through some bushes, dirty, smelling pretty bad, most of them hurt, dehydrated but all of them smiling and trying to see the nice part of it. They got back and aside from the bad effects, it was actually a good mission. And they were so not going back there.

Janet of course, while doing her checks on the people, noticed something. Sam kept on smiling and touching her finger. One particular finger. Janet was trying not to let her hope rise high but it was very difficult. Her friend was obviously happy and all the signs were pointing to one certain thing. Could it really be? Janet wanted to know… desperately. They agreed on talking later - luckily. Jack was supposed to have a meeting in the evening and they could use some girl time together anyway.

Janet came over to Sam's place. Cassie was staying with Daniel, he was helping her with some school project. Sam made them dinner, Janet brought some wine and they just sat down to the living room, both enjoying the time, talking about bits and pieces, about anything and everything. The whole evening, however, Janet was observing her best friend.

She kept on touching her finger, she kept on smiling in between sentences, she seemed to be lost in her thoughts from time to time with a very suspicious dreamy look on her face. Again, those hopes rising up and up and up… could it really mean that those two would…?

"Okay, enough." Janet couldn't take it anymore.

"What?"

"What's going on with you?"

"Nothing." And that reply came out too quickly.

"Yes? That's why you look like you're living in seventh heaven? Touching your finger like you know… there should be a ring there? You keep on smiling… is there anything you'd like to share with me?"

And while talking Janet realized that Sam was smiling more and more, not trying to hide or argue, just letting her friend absorb the information without confirming anything out loud.

"Oh my God, you are engaged…" Janet realized. It all made sense. Hopes just flew few miles high.

Sam just took the chain she had around her neck and after playing with the clasp for a moment, she managed to take off her ring from there. She put it onto her finger and absentmindedly smiled. It felt right to have it there. Janet squealed, hugged her and made her show her the ring.

"Okay, spill, come on… I want details." She knew she sounded like kid high on sugar but well, sometimes one couldn't help it!

"Details?"

"Yes! I want to know everything… Jack O'Neill proposing marriage to you, that is just so huge…"

"Janet…"

"Come on! Be nice! Share…" However Sam could just glare at her. The behavior was amusing, yes, but she didn't know how to deal with it. So she just gave her best friend_ the_ look.

"Okay okay, for now you can leave out the juicy details but you are definitely sharing those later."

And Sam could just laugh then. Janet was her best friend and she wanted to share it with her but she wasn't sure about Jack's opinion. There were things they just wanted to keep to themselves.

"I don't know Janet…"

"Hmm…. Here we go again… you know it's not fair, right?"

"Janet…"

"All right, all right, I give up."

"Thank you."

"So just… was it romantic?" She asked, hoping to get an answer anyway. She really craved some information. It was the best-friend thing, right?

Sam settled into the cushions, folded her legs beneath her and hugged a pillow to her chest. She looked like seventeen years old again, falling in love all over again with the cutes guy at school.

"Yes, it was very romantic…"

"Kneeling on the ground with flowers or something?"

"No, not really… but it was…." And then she got lost in her memories. The morning had been so beautiful, with the sunrise and the soft glow. She would always remember how it felt to be there with him, how he was touching her and admiring, how he loved her and gave her his heart. How he pulled out the ring and slipped it on her finger, making her cry with pure happiness. And how they made love then, it was like never before…

Janet understood. It had been obviously something epic. She was smiling then as well, happy for her friends. They deserved this, both of them, especially together. Besides she might spill the details later, while being drunk or something.

"You're happy?"

"Yes."

"And how come you didn't tell me?"

"We didn't tell anyone. Just let you guys figure it out. We knew you would, sooner or later."

"So … no wedding planning yet?"

"No, not really. We haven't even talked about that."

"You will…"

And Sam could just smile and nod. She would have to start thinking about it sooner or later anyway. They haven't decided on anything but both knew that there was no rush but also, no need to wait years for doing it. She was already looking forward to changing her surname.

"We will, but first we have to tell my dad…"

"No, first you have to tell Cassie and guys because otherwise you're gonna be so in troubles…"

"I know…"

"I suggest a party and a cake so you have something to bribe them with…" Janet offered her ideas and soon they were both laughing, thinking about what could and would probably happen. But Sam was sure that everybody would understand that they wanted to keep it to themselves just for a little while. Or she was hoping they would.

They talked for long hours, the time was passing them by nicely. But sometimes during the evening Sam started to worry a bit. It was really late and Jack was supposed to be back already. She assumed he just got caught up on the base though. But then, it was long past midnight, actually it was more like very early morning the other day, Janet was about to get up and leave. She was having free day so she could sleep and relax and all… Then Sam noticed the time and got really worried.

"Sam?"

"Yes?"

"You okay?"

"Yeah, sure."

"I know what the Colonel means by _I can hear you thinking, Carter_ thing. What's up?"

"He should have been here hours ago."

"He just got caught up or something."

"Probably…"

"But you're worried anyway." Janet said and left the option of talk in the air. She just wanted Sam to now that she could tell her… and that she also didn't have to. And she knew it. She looked at her, knowing she could trust her, she decided to open up a bit to her. They were friends after all.

"Since…"

"The ladybug mission?"

"What?"

"Don't ask, you don't want to know… just go with it." Janet obviously didn't want to explain how _that_ mission got this particular name. It was fitting but still.

"Okay…well we usually try to let the other one know, at least a short call, a message, something."

"You still have the nightmares?"

"Sometimes…" And it cost her a lot to admit that.

"How bad are they?"

"It's getting better… really."

"Good…"

"But still, knowing is better than not knowing, you know? It's just…"

"I'm sure he's okay... Either still in the briefing room or sleeping somewhere on the base, he had to be pretty exhausted after the last mission."

"Yes, you're probably right…"

But Janet could see the worry lines on her friend's forehead. She thought that they were past beyond that. Obviously some of the deep issues still remained unsolved. They haven't talked it through. Or maybe they have and the nightmares were simply there out of pure genuine fear of losing the loved one. It would make sense too. She knew that the Colonel was going nuts when he had no news about Sam. And it seemed like she was exactly the same.

It was actually kind of sweet.

Sam knew that she was probably overreacting right then but somehow she got a very bad feeling about the situation. Jack would have called or at least sent a message. No, it wasn't like him just not to let her know. But maybe the meeting… oh she would just wait and see.

Janet stayed there sitting on the couch, talking to her friend, distracting her from calling the base. No, she needed to make it through. The base would have let them know about injuries or stuff like that. So Jack was really probably just asleep on the base, exhausted.

They both fell asleep on the couch. And few hours later, it could be eight in the morning or something, Jack walked into the house. He looked very sad and very tired. His shoulders down, face with pained expression, his whole body was screaming that he was not having a good day.

He noticed two sleeping forms on the couch. With a small smile he walked over, covered them both with a blanket, kissed both their foreheads and walked away. He wanted to let them sleep for few more minutes, hours, whatever.

He needed to be alone.

And as he knew Sam, she probably stayed up whole night, waiting for him. He was very grateful that she wasn't alone. It was definitely better that she was having company. Besides Fraiser looked like she could use the time with Sam as well.

Jack took a shower, long hot shower. Something he would do only in bad times. He was a soldier, he was used to quick efficient showers. Just sometimes his body and mind needed the whole hot thing, the water and steam, he needed to clear his head and let his muscles relax. He had no idea how long he had been standing there but eventually he stepped out and got dressed. Nothing fancy, just pair of sweats and t-shirt.

Any other day he would smile because of something Carter had told him few months ago. It was the first time she had seen him in the morning right after taking a shower. She was watching him getting dressed and then, only few hours later she was helping him to get undressed. And it was her who took the t-shirt later. She seemed to be so happy… he got jealous of his own t-shirt.

And then she confessed. She liked his clothes, she liked his smell, it was calming her down while it was enveloping her. And since then he had caught her many times sniffling his clothes while he was hugging her or sitting close. She would always nuzzle her face into his chest. She told him she loved him in his dress blues but even more dressed like this, knowing he was comfortable enough around her.

But today he had just plain clothes and not even thinking about Carter could make him smile. Not today.

He made some coffee. He knew both ladies would gladly take it. Oh yes, he knew them. He sat down in the backyard, coffee in his hand, bare feet, and wet hair sticking into every possible direction. Deep pain in his chest was making him want to scream and cry. And yet he couldn't. His whole body tensed, he could just sit there and hope that he would cope with this. He just didn't know how.

Inside the house both ladies woke up. The smell of fresh coffee couldn't be mistaken and both their brains picked up on it. They smiled at each other.

"Hey…"

"Morning…"

"We fell asleep."

"I guess we did… but I don't remember getting the blanket."

"Me neither… and I smell coffee."

"Me too…" Yes, she knew her eyes were sparkling. How did she know? Her friend had the same … problem. The promise of fresh coffee could do just that.

"I guess your fiancé came home after all…"

And it surprised her to see the blush on Sam's face.

"Oh my… that is just so cute!"

"What is?"

"You're blushing…" And she kept on teasing her. It was nice to finally have something to tease this lady about. But then they sat up, looked around and didn't see anyone. They got up and walked to the kitchen to get the coffee. Breakfast could wait, coffee couldn't.

And then they noticed him, sitting outside, looking… strange. They were both watching him, thinking.

"I should go…"

"You don't have to, you can stay for breakfast. And a shower if you want to."

"Thanks, but no. I can have breakfast with Daniel and Cassie, they're both probably still asleep anyway. And you need to go out there and find out what happened to him."

Sam knew Janet would see. Something had happened to him. They both checked their pagers and cell-phones but there were no calls. Whatever happened wasn't work related.

So she just hugged her, thanked her and walked her out. Then, with her own cup of coffee, she walked outside to join Jack.

"Hey…" She greeted him. He looked up to her face and she could recognize that something had happened indeed. She smiled at him though.

"Hey beautiful…" He told her, meaning every word.

She wanted to sit down next to him but something about his posture told her to do otherwise. She kept on standing there, close enough to be able to touch him but not too close so he could still have his space.

"You had a nice evening?"

"Yes, it was good… Oh, Janet knows about the engagement."

"Does she?" And now he was supposed to have his light teasing tone. So why he couldn't?

"She figured it out."

"I had no doubts… was she happy?"

"Yes, she was…"

"Good."

And Sam knew he was happy too but somehow right there right then she knew something had gone wrong. He wouldn't look into her eyes, he just kept on sitting there, elbows on his knees, his face in his hands. She didn't dare to touch him, not yet. She had to know what happened first.

"I'm sorry." He suddenly said, quietly, with guilt seeping from every syllable.

"For what?"

"I should have called."

"We figured you just got caught up on the base."

"Oh. Yeah…" And again, he looked like a kicked puppy. Sad, lonely and with lots of pain hidden deep inside. Sam was getting worried. Instead of thinking too much she just continued with the conversation. Sometimes it was the best way.

"Janet stayed so she could stop me from calling there…" That was supposed to be a joke... and it didn't work out that way.

"I left on time, Sam."

"But you didn't go home." She understood. He had left the base on time… and then he kept on wandering around… now she was getting scared.

"I guess I just… needed to walk."

Sam felt her throat closing up, her hands shaking, heart hammering in her chest. What could have possibly happened? He was using short sentences, low voice, he had pain in his eyes, tension in his body. She put down her mug and took a step closer. She wanted to touch him, to offer comfort, she wanted to know what was this about.

"Jack…"

"I'm sorry…"

"No no, it's okay… you don't have to tell me if you don't want to… just don't shut me out and tell me what do you need, what can I do."

"Carter…"

"Please. Jack, please..."

And he wanted to tell her. He wanted her to go. He wanted to be alone. Desperately. But the idea of losing her, the image of her walking away and letting him be alone was even more painful than he would have thought few years ago. No, he got spoiled, now he needed her to deal with his life. Was it wrong? Maybe. He kept on thinking… was he ready to tell her? Was he ready to share? Was he?

There was no other option, not now, not ever again. He gave her his soul, his heart, his life. And she had gained his trust years ago. So why was it so difficult now? Why? It wasn't supposed to be like this. Not after what they had been put through together. He hesitated with his answer. And hated himself for that - for possibly breaking her heart.

Sam was waiting, patiently, knowing he needed the time. She had no idea that this behavior was actually killing him. He was aware of the level of her trust and love. She was giving him time... Suddenly he had to face the fact that she really knew him. It wasn't easy. But it also wasn't scary, not anymore.

She just touched his hair, she started to caress his scalp, gently, as she knew he liked when he was troubled by something. They stayed silent for a long time.

"I need you to be here for me, with me…" He told her eventually.

He reached for her and she willingly stepped in between his legs. He pulled her close and pushed his face into her stomach. He hugged her and she could just hug him back and keep on caressing his hair. Long time ago she figured it out. This was the position to bring him the most comfort. His large body seemed to be small and fragile like this, she had the power over him, she was protecting him, saving him, she was his anchor, his safe harbor. And so, as during many other times, she stayed there with his face pressed to her stomach and his hands holding her for dear life. She kept on whispering something incoherent, she kept on playing with his hair, she was there for him.

She was also scared. What happened?

On the other hand she was grateful. He wanted her to be with him. It meant so much.

And as usually, like he could really actually hear her thinking, he gave her the answer. What happened to him? It was bad.

"I lost a friend."

"Oh Jack… I'm so sorry..."

"I got the call last night." And that was all he said for a long time. Sam didn't know what exactly to do so she kept on holding him, hoping he would give her a sign and let her know. It must have been someone close to do this to him, someone he cared about. This reaction was … surprising.

The sky got darker, there could be water smelled in the air. It would start raining soon. Those two were still there, silent, in the same position for a long time. Eventually Jack looked up at her and after looking into her eyes for a few moments, he closed his eyes and put his head back, leaning against her. She was scared, he knew, but she was being brave – for him. He loved her.

"He was the youngest of us."

"Of the team?"

"Yeah… he was the youngest one. And he… he died first." Jack's voice was hoarse, strained, like he couldn't voice out these thoughts and facts. It hurt.

"Jack…"

"And you know what is the damned worst thing about this?"

Sam knew he was angry. She could understand. And she was really mad that there was nothing for her to do or say. She could detect the distant guilt in his voice already. Like he could protect him but he failed. It couldn't be like that though… no, she was sure.

However instead of answering she remained silent. He would tell her sooner or later on his own, under his conditions.

"The worst thing is … that he survived everything only to get killed by stupid cancer."

He looked up at her and she could see the tears in his eyes. This was really difficult for him. And because they were not really used to this situation, she didn't know what to expect, what to do. For a second there she started to doubt the decision to get married because they were still obviously having issues. But then she felt his grip on her hips tightening and knew that no matter what, they would pull through. Together.

Sam looked at him, tried to smile, tried to offer comfort, she kissed his hair, she kept on touching him to make him feel. He was alive and he had to know that. She had to make sure he would know...

"Not a knife, not a bullet, not an explosion… cancer!" Oh he was angry…

Before Sam could do a thing, it started to rain. She would swear that her t-shirt got wet before that – from his tears marking her, letting her know the depths of his pain and other emotions. It was rare for him to be showing his emotions but she was glad when he did. It was bringing them closer, opening many doors and options, making them see and feel a lot more than usually. However this time she felt so helpless. Damn.

It was raining and here she was, standing, the man she loved in her arms, crying with his face buried into her t-shirt, holding her, his shoulders shaking slightly – from emotions or cold from the rained soaked through clothes, she didn't know, it didn't matter.

Jack didn't know how it happened. He was ready to cope with everything as he was used to. Instead of that he could feel his barriers slipping away, his emotions running wild and suddenly he was holding Carter, not willing to let her move a single inch, crying. He was actually crying. Of course he was, he was so damn pissed… and so sad. It was irrational, he knew, but all of them had been hoping that this kid would not die on them. And then he died first.

One part of him was yelling at him to get up and run away. But the other one won. The other one was the one that could feel Sam's gentle hands holding him, caressing, he could feel the cold ring on her finger and it gave him the strength he needed to stay with her, to ask her to be with him. He knew she was crying with him, sharing his feelings, taking away part of the pain from him and putting it onto her own shoulders.

He was an old man, he had his habits and sometimes those were impossible to break of change. Or he thought as much. Now he was sharing something with the woman he cared about, he was in vulnerable position. But his instincts were telling him that she would defend him, she wouldn't let anything or anyone get near to hurt him, to break him more. No, she would take care of him. She loved him too.

The realization hit him yet again and opened something in him. He couldn't stop the tears, he couldn't stop the thoughts, no, he was no longer a soldier, he was just a man that had just lost one of his closest friends.

Sam could feel the change in him – in his shoulders, in his hands, in the way he held her. That was her opportunity.

"Jack, let's go inside…"

And he didn't move. He couldn't. Not now.

"Jack… It's okay, I promise. We just go inside..."

And her gentle voice, guiding hands and simple presence made him do as she was asking him. He stood up but however instead of walking in, he remained there in the rain for some time, just letting the water wash away the pain and confusion, the fear and all the other emotions, the hot tears. It took him some time before he could look at Sam. He was a bit worried about what he would see.

But there she was, being strong for him, with tears of her own on her face, waiting for him to come to her, to tell her what he needed, to guide her as well as accept the comfort from her, comfort and love that would pull him through this.

He reached for her, pulled her to him and kissed her passionately. He wasn't thinking about it, he just decided to listen to his instincts for once. And those were screaming "kiss her".

Sam was a bit surprised but she had already promised herself she would let him tell her what he needed. And if he needed this kiss to feel alive, she would not be the one to stop him.

He held her for few more moments before looking deep into her eyes. And she could just kiss him again, gently, lovingly, tenderly. She was there – for him. And she was not going anywhere. And that was actually more than okay with him.


	5. So they planned it

_**A/N**__: Sorry about the delay – my muse decided to take a break from this story… I'm also sorry because I lost my touch with this piece. However I promise to try to do my best to finish this in the way it had been planned. Hope it's not gonna be a huge disappointment._

* * *

><p><strong>So they planned it<strong>

They spent the rest of the day together, partially in the living room, partially in the bedroom. Jack was exhausted. So in the end he fell asleep in her arms. Resting his head in her lap, he seemed to find some peace at last. Sam was reading a book the whole time, then finish a report. She knew that this issue would have consequences but she also knew that it was all up to Jack.

When she tried to get up from the bed, his grip on her tightened and she couldn't go anywhere. She should mind, she should be at least worried or something, but she was just glad that she could be the comfort he seemed to so desperately need.

It didn't go unnoticed by her though. This was Jack O'Neill, the tough guy, the private man that had always been able to deal with everything on his own, he was not one of those that would share personal stuff and feelings and here he was. Did she really change him so much? Did the love they shared? What happened?

She just leaned down and kissed him. She really needed to get up.

"Jack…"

"Hm…"

"I need to get up."

"No, stay in bed…"

"Jack… I will come back later but right now I really have to go."

With a grunt he moved away and let her get up. Despite everything it was actually kind of cute.

Jack realized what happened then. He couldn't understand it though. Did he really…? Really? Seriously? Wow. He was a mess, huh?

Before he could start feeling really weird, his phone started to ring. And he knew what that would be. With a heavy heard he picked up.

"Hey, Sunny…"

"_Charms, hey."_

"Everybody knows?"

"_Yeah… I called you all."_

"What's the plan?"

"_Could you come over? I think we should deal with this together."_

"Yeah, absolutely."

"_You told Sam?"_

And after a moment of silence Jack just sighed.

"Yeah, I did…"

"_Okay… could you get here tonight?"_

"Yeah, I think so. You want me to call the others?"

"_I…"_

"I'll call them, Sunny."

"_Thanks…"_

"Yep."

"_See you in few hours."_

"Sure."

And then Jack put the phone down. He was a commanding officer himself. He knew that there was nothing worse than having to call somebody to tell them about something like this. The initial call was brief. Just a hello and then in the most military tone possible simple message about death of one of their own due to cancer. Nothing else. But this would be… difficult. Personal.

Sam heard the conversation and understood. Another issue in their life that would be pretty dangerous and … scary a bit. She had no idea what would happen, how would Jack react. She was surprised to realize her own insecurities. They were supposed to trust each other implicitly. They were supposed to live as a couple. And yet sometimes all the old doubts and worries seemed to come back to disturb them. Like now.

She wanted to go back in but decided against it. Now, he was about to call his friends and arrange the meeting at Sunny's café. No, he needed to be alone. She knew that he was probably feeling a bit embarrassed about his earlier display of feelings anyway. There was no need to press the issue more.

Jack took a deep breath, plopped down back to the bed and dialed one familiar number. After third ring there was an answer.

"Batman? It's me, Charms… "

They all started like that… no Hi and no How are you, no pleasantries. No, just pure business. It had to be that way. Those phone calls were exhausting.

Jack waited for Sam to come back but she never did. So he went to find her. Maybe she was avoiding him. Well he wouldn't be surprised. His latest actions were not those of a commanding officer. He found her in the kitchen, cooking some sauce and pasta for early dinner.

"Hey.." He tried. She looked at him and smiled. It didn't reach her eyes though.

"What are we having?"

"I don't know yet… you know how it is with me and cooking. Could be anything in the end…"

"Nah, you're getting much much better…"

He tried to lighten up the mood. She used to be a lousy cook but she indeed was getting better. He came to her, locked his arms around her and kissed her neck. She didn't really respond.

"I'll set the table, okay?" And he felt her just nod.

They ate in silence. And it was not the comfortable one as usually, no, this time it was awkward and making them both feel very uncomfortable. Sam didn't know what to do and he was in no better condition. It was a new ground for them to be walking on. And it proved to be difficult.

Jack approached Sam afterwards. He had packed few things just in case and got ready. He sat down next to her on their couch. He tried to reach for her and was pleasantly surprised when she let him hold her hand. At least something, right?

"I should be back tomorrow."

"Be careful."

"I will."

And knowing that this – whatever it was – would need time, he just got up and walked to the door. Any other time in the past he would have just walked through. But he couldn't. Not anymore. He came back, took her face into his hands, kissed her with all love and passion he could find in himself, just to let her know that he cared. His heart skipped a beat when he felt her respond and participate. It meant a lot. It meant that they would be fine.

"I love you." He told her then and left before she had time to say it back.

And so he drove up to Sunny's place. He was the first one there. Belle saw him, came to him and hugged him. She knew all her boys so this had to be pretty hard on her as well. They went to one of the biggest tables and sat down. Sunny was still working. Jack knew it was one of the good ways how to cope with these things. They used to call him the lucky one. He was the one that had never lost a man from the unit. Till now.

"How are you holdin' up, Belle?"

"I'm gonna miss the boy. But I think I will be fine. What about you?"

"Yeah… me too. He's not the first one I've lost."

"Jack…"

"Don't worry, I'll handle it." And she knew that his tone was telling her not to talk about it any longer. She just reached over and took his hand in hers. He kissed her fingers and then got up to go and talk to Sunny.

He found him in the back, finishing something.

"Hey…"

"Hey. Anybody else?"

"Not yet but they will all come."

"Okay…"

"Need any help?"

Sunny just stopped working and turned to Jack. They sat down together instead of working on whatever it was. They would have to talk about it. But they would wait for others. There was no pint in torturing themselves two times instead of just one. No. So Sunny opted for another topic.

"So… what was it about telling Samantha?"

Jack just sighed and Sunny's curiosity was tempted to ask more.

"I'd say she's one that can understand the situation."

"Yeah, she can understand…"

"So what's the problem?"

"I lost it, Sunny. And she was amazing. Helpful and understanding and everything…"

"So?"

"I don't know. It was just so damn weird afterwards."

And Sunny just smiled. Jack couldn't believe his former boss and long-time friend would be smiling in situation like this!

"Just ask Belle how it was when I broke down in front of her the first time..." Sunny said, squeezed his shoulder and left him sitting there, thinking.

Jack knew that in few minutes others would be there and they would have to face the situation but he couldn't help it, he had to deal with this as well. He loved Sam and it was not the first time she had seen him crying or losing his mind – and yet this was different. It was because he realized – he knew – that he would need her to make it through this. He used to be independent. But not anymore.

And after everything she was avoiding him. Or was she just trying to give him space? He needed it. But then he came out of the room and she was there. And that was just fine with him.

So he picked up his phone and called her, just to let her know that he was okay and already waiting for others. She thanked him, told him to be careful and not to drive after drinking.

"Like I ever would, Carter."

"I know… but still… better stay there till you're sober or give me a call and I'll come and get you, okay?"

"I love you." He said, yet again that day and hung up the phone – without actually giving her an answer. But he had this distant feeling that they all would be staying. And he wasn't sure about the getting drunk part at all.

There were not many times after losing Charlie when he would end up really drunk. No, he had already tried taking that road but it was a disaster and now he was not willing to take those risks – not again. Alcohol was okay but surprisingly not in the hardest situations – it wouldn't erase the pain and memories, it would just make him feel guilty and like a total loser. Besides – while in real pain he needed to feel to know he was still alive. It wasn't any better option but it was the one he had chosen long ago.

When he went to the table again, he saw two other men sitting there, looking equally devastated and sad. So he took a deep breath and went for it. This was it – something they had always been afraid of.

Soon all eleven of them were there, sitting around the table, mourning their lost friend. Belle joined them after closing the café. She knew these guys needed the time. There were other stops and cafés not so far away so anybody tired could go there and take the needed rest. Maybe it was selfish but her boys needed the solitude, at least partially. And it was one of the rare things she could do for them.

Sunny gave them all some time but then he took a letter from his pocket.

"What's that, Sunny?"

"This is a letter from Merlin. He gave it to me the last time he was here."

"He told you he was dying?"

"No, that little sneaky bastard didn't say a thing."

"What's in there, Sunny?"

And Sunny looked around the table and opened the letter.

"Aside from the personal stuff I found this…" and he began to read the actual part of the letter. _"I know we agreed we would never do it but come on! I won't be here for too long and I know that telling her now would just make things worse. But if there's something you can do after I'm gone, it's this. Tell them, make them see and understand, be honest and let them help you. Trust me, when the time comes you're gonna need it… besides they need it too and they deserve to know."_

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Blade…"

"No, it's crazy, absolutely crazy!"

"What is? Telling our women what we did for living?"

"Yes!"

"Why?"

"Kathy was put through enough when I was missing or about to die in some hospital room. I'm not gonna put her through it again." And he had to get up and take a few steps away. Maybe he was selfish but he was thinking only about protecting the woman he happened to love more than himself.

Belle looked around the table and noticed that others seemed to be more conflicted than this. And she knew it was difficult but she also knew that this had to be dealt with. Now.

"Eric… when Kathy was waiting in that room to be told about you, was she alone there?"

"What?"

"Was she alone or with some other woman, hm?" Belle tried to push the issue a bit. And she wasn't surprised when Batman looked up and sighed.

"Come on, bro, you know she wasn't alone. Suzanne was with her because I was in the OR next to you…"

"And the point is?" Blade – Eric, asked Belle.

"They saw each other, both hurting, scared and yet they had no idea that the two of you had been put through the same. Maybe it would have helped knowing… sharing the fear."

"That's not entirely true, Belle. People in the waiting room form bonds… But I see your point anyway." Batman admitted.

"Okay boys, it was Merlin's wish but I'm not gonna force you. I'm in a different situation here cause Belle knows I was your CO in the Special Forces and that we've been through a little hell together. Just think about it. Please."

Sunny told them. And he could see his boys, all of them sitting there, obviously thinking, conflicted and unsure about what to do. He knew that their girlfriends and wives had already met – as Belle said in the hospitals or waiting for them. He had met them all – mostly here in this café. His boys tried to take them there if they could. And so there was a huge possibility that those women were familiar with each other. But the truth was, maybe they really deserved to know – to be told. Right?

"Charms, what do you think?" Curly asked Jack, hoping to get a straight answer from him. He knew that Jack would always give that to him.

"Oh don't ask me…"

"Why? You told Samantha?"

"Yeah."

"What? You really did?"

"Yeah, I really did. And don't look that surprised Curly…"

"Sorry… it's just… you're the last one to share things like this."

"I love her, Curly. I'm gonna marry her. And she deserved to know."

"But that's different, Curly, stop asking him. Sam is former Air Force officer, she takes things differently. My wife is a kindergarten teacher, how do you think she'd react?"

"They are not different at all, buddy…" Jack said. And suddenly he felt all the eyes upon him, watching him, hoping to get an explanation. Again he managed to get himself into rather tricky situation.

"What?"

"In what is she different from your wife, hm? She shares the bed with me, your wife shares it with you. She loves me, I love her. Your wife loves you, you love her. She had always known about me doing something dangerous. I'm sure your wife knows too. They're not stupid. They just learned not to ask questions. Why? Because they know we can't answer them and they don't want to argue. But they are not different at all."

"Jack…"

"Look, I told her because I needed her to know, that's all! She doesn't know the details of course. She just knows what's important so she can understand when I wake up in the middle of the night screaming in Arabic or when I'm afraid to go to sleep or what is the reason behind me being afraid to repair my own damned car!" Jack told him, obviously touched by this subject.

"So tell me, where is the difference, hm? Where? That Sam is Air force? Really? Does that make her any less vulnerable or precious? Maybe she can't change anything but I know she loves me for what I am despite everything..." And it was Sunny's hand on his shoulder that reminded him that these people were close to him and that he should calm down.

They knew that there had to be some other sides of this confession and as they knew each other their guess would be awkwardness after difficult times and some not so pleasant moments. But they all could see his point.

They all had been thinking, wondering, once or twice or more times in the past about their marriages and relationships. Their loved ones had to live with the secret hanging in the air between them. Knowing might not help them to cope but it could be one of the steps in the right direction.

"You're not telling us everything, Charms."

"No, I'm not."

"So…?"

"I can't tell you… irony, huh?"

And despite all the tension Sunny laughed. Those boys were really impossible. But Jack could see that his friends were about to agree. They just needed a little push. He was very thankful for Daniel and his constant questions – he made him think more about people and it seemed to be helpful in difficult times.

"Sam… she's glad that she knows. It's easier for her to know the reasons why she can't help me than not knowing anything at all. And I admit, it's easier when I don't need excuses and stories."

"You're still keeping something for yourself, man."

"Of course I am." He smirked.

And others laughed along with them. After few more minutes of thinking, they all said yes – they would meet, all of them together, and they would talk to their wives. Maybe it was not the best idea ever – but maybe Merlin was right and it would be best just to tell them.

"How are we going to do it?"

"Well… we can't actually tell them everything but we can agree on … what to tell them."

"Sunny, what are you talking about?"

"Remember the house, the cabin up in the mountains where we had the first party?"

"After we all came back from the jungle…Merlin's first mission with us." Squirrel smiled. Sunny nodded.

"Let's go there, all of us, together once again. We can pay some respects to Merlin and we can tell them. Might be easier for them to have the chance to talk to other women, what do you think?"

And they could agree. It sounded okay. There was the possibility of having privacy if needed, the area was huge and there were many places around where they could go.

They agreed on one weekend and Sunny offered to arrange everything. And the best possible case scenario would be all wives and girlfriends agreeing and having time to go. Sunny was already thinking about what to say so no rules and promises would be broken. There had to be a way – and he would find it. He had to agree with his boys here – Jack had it easier because Sam had pretty high clearance!

There would be no funeral for them to go to. Merlin's family wanted just a simple ceremony, not even military one. And they would never disagree with that wish. But they would pay him respects anyway – here and then in the mountains. He was one of them. And he was not supposed to die, not at all.

So they all, sitting around the table, had one drink to honor him. Every one of them had something personal to say. And instead of getting drunk, they all had a piece of pie. It was Merlin's favorite pie actually. Belle made it because she knew they would want it anyway.

Merlin hated alcohol. His brother died because of it and he just couldn't bare it. Getting a drink or two from time to time, that he could do. But he would never get really drunk. So doing it to honor his memory would be really twisted. But having his favorite pie… that sounded okay.

They all stayed there till early morning, talking about Merlin and their past, laughing at old jokes and old stories, remembering all the lost friends and comrades, mourning them and honoring them – yet not getting drunk. It could be considered as surprising but well, what could really be surprising about this officially never existing unit?

They also figured out what to tell their wives, girlfriends and fiancées. It sounded dangerous – and promising.

After the sunrise they had breakfast, large cup of coffee and when they were parting, they all were thinking about the upcoming trip to the mountains. It would probably change a lot in their lives. Hopefully for the better.

Before leaving Jack wanted to ask Belle about her husband breaking down in front of her – but then it hit him. And he knew what he had to do, what he had to say, to make things right. He realized the truth behind this. He was lucky man indeed.

So he texted Sam and with a coffee-to-go he left the place, ready to face another day.


End file.
